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DSCN2802I have been at a loss to know how to blog.  But today I think I just say how it is and that everything is not all bad.

We had some very precious days during this summer.  Fun filled and full of life.


We have learned some very important things about living.  We have learned to treasure every moment (well most of them).  We feel that up till now we have lived lives with eyes half open.  Our eyes have been opened to see the importance of important things.

We understand now how in the desert there are oasis and that the sources are often unexpected.  We have laughed and cried and raged and prayed.  We have now accepted a new kind of normal for us.  This normal now is set to change to another level as we leave next weekend for new treatment in London.  The cancer is extremely rare, very aggressive and rarely, if ever seen in children.  None of the team of doctors has treated this cancer in a child before.  We are booked in for experimental treatment.  The road ahead is a rocky one, but we have also learned that we only have enough courage to face one day at a time.

I have found Perkins who is waiting for a new home!


I have given this handknit a new home


I have just started to spin enough for a jumper (maybe).  This is Whitefaced Woodland and I am spinning it longdraw which is also a new challenge for me.  Spinning was something I have only just started to do again.  I found it gave me too much time for reflection and so could not face it all summer.  Now I find it soothing and peaceful.


I have had some great shows, particularly Wonderwool and Yarndale this year.  I have some to look forward to next year too.

In short life goes on.  Studded with joys and treasures among the grey days and dark nights.  We are still together and we have fun and laughter when we can take it.  We have just learned how to dig a little deeper.

DSCN2863We made a happy jumper!!

About jillybeanyarns

Artist, maker, creative mess-maker. Expert in complications and chaos. #livingwithcancer

6 responses »

  1. Hello, you cannot believe how happy I was to hear from you…I almost ‘wrote’ last week and thought, no we should be hearing soon and here you are with your wonderful granddaughters.
    You have been in my prayers and will continue to be so. Will put her doctors on that list also! That is quite a ‘wabbit’ 🙂 and that is one happy sweater!! Good job.
    Take care.

  2. You really do look life square in the eye and dare to see the marvels and the happiness. I wish you all strength for the days ahead and am grateful that you found the space to share some of the sweet moments. Best wishes.

  3. Thank you so much for your thoughts and support. X

  4. Thinking of you all. Sending strength, positive thoughts and love your way. Xx

  5. Hello Jilly Bean, I just came across your blog. To read of your granddaughter brought tears to my eyes as I am a mum of 4 kids. I will keep you all in my prayers and truly believe that the creator of the universe has you in his hands. Tell your granddaughter that he loves her very much.


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